This morning we gathered for breakfast, and then it was off to committee meetings. We began at 9:00 am and went well into the afternoon. I am on the Mission Support Services committee, otherwise known as the "bean counters."
As the name suggests, our agenda is usually not filled with glitzy, exciting work. Much of the time is spent reviewing financial statements and compliance with legal standards. It is important work but not the type of work that makes headlines.
Some tidbits include a potential buyer for the Mary Holmes College property. We learned that FEMA has done some minor renovations to some of the vacant buildings, and they are presently housing about 200 Katrina victims. Menaul School is selling some real estate. We approved an adjustment to endowment fund fees. We learned more about the Sarbanes-Oxley Act and the improvements that are being made to improve our accountability as a corporation. We reviewed financial statements. We heard reports about work with our partner churches in Pakistan, particularly as it relates to property issues. We heard reports about our conference centers and took action on some technical issues. We learned about the rapid growth of internet contributions to Presbyterian Disaster Assistance. We heard about efforts to revamp the denomination's web presence into the backbone of our communication and resource distribution functions. We also learned from the Presbyterian Investment and Loan Program about a growing problem of pastors being unable to afford housing near churches where they are called and strategies that might include returning to the day when congregations owned a manse. This is just a sampling.
We had worship before supper and then heard and participated in a report on the Peace, Unity, and Purity Task Force for two hours in the evening. Task force members Mark Achtemeier, Gary Demarest, Jean Stoner, and Barbara Wheeler interpreted the report and led us in a brief small group discussion process. There wasn't much presented that wasn't already in the report or widely available if you have already been following the task force developments. The small group discussion was more of a personal nature and would not be appropriate to discuss here. However, I would like to share a personal reflection.
Parker Palmer wrote in one of his books about meeting with his counselor. He told his counselor of a recurring dream of being chased by a faceless monster. The dream was filled with his desperate attempts to escape. Palmer's counselor suggested that when he had these dreams, he should try to turn around and confront the monster so he could see what it was. When the dream returned, Palmer summoned the courage to face the monster. When he turned around to face the monster, he was stunned to see that it was himself.
There was deep brokenness in his life. He had convinced himself that if he just ran a little harder, performed a little better, and distanced himself from those things that disturbed him, he could break free. Instead, he learned he had to turn around, face the "monster," and embrace it as part of himself. There is considerable fear and shame in embracing the monster, but Palmer learned it was the only way he could begin to find peace, unity, and purity within his soul. I know whereof he speaks.
Mark Achtemeier referenced a portion of the report discussing Jesus' prayer that we may all be one. He didn't pray for us to be alike or agree. It is not our agreement that makes us one, but Christ who calls and unites us, even when we choose not to live like it.
We Presbyterians have a rich history. Not so long ago, we found ourselves at the center of the culture and took considerable pride in that. Now we find ourselves ever receding to the margins. Why? Because this or that faction of the church is dragging us down! If we can just defeat that faction, run a little harder, do a little better, and keep putting on a positive face, we can break free. But like a recurring nightmare, we find ourselves desperately running from the monster.
Have we been too full of pride in our past? Are we living in shame over our diminished status in the culture's eyes? Who is the monster we are so terrified to face? Is there enough courage to stop, turn, and face the monster? It is a terrifying and shameful thing to contemplate. It requires a public confession that we are broken. The good news is there is a God who is passionately in love with broken people and delights in using our brokenness to reach the world.
Leave a Reply