Four Things Groups Want that Leaders Can’t Give — and One They Can

Harvard Business Review: Four Things Groups Want that Leaders Can't Give — and One They Can

Emerging group experiences have predictable dynamics, whether they are new project teams, training and development programs, wilderness experiences, or just people learning new jobs. People form relationships based on first impressions and sometimes-false hopes, find that things haven't gone as imagined, and then struggle through confusion and misunderstanding to create their own positive norms that help them work effectively. The best leaders help people through these stages only to find some common issues popping up — things people seem to want that even the best leaders can't provide.

Anticipating these dilemmas makes it easier to resolve them. Here are four desires that are almost impossible to satisfy:

1. Absolutely clear expectations about everything. …
2. Perfect certainty about the future. …
3. Yes all the time. …
4. The ending at the beginning. …

… The one thing groups want that leaders can always provide, with predictably positive results, is TLC — tender loving care. People respond well to a sympathetic ear and frequent communication. Knowing that leaders care about their success can help people let go of the rest.